Every battle there is a judge and it can feel that the judge, changes each time Sometimes finally accepting that the judge is in fact YOU!

quote-Natalie-Portman-theres-always-pressure-from-other-people-and-98100-inspirationalIsn’t it funny how the world can turn and change and karma can come back and bite people on the backside. The world is a place where judgement is no longer rare instead it is regular and constant more constant then your closest friend. We are all guilty of judging before getting to know the truth, sometimes people will admit they are judgmental and will make a conscious attempt to change.

“Don’t JUDGE my path. If you haven’t walked my path”

FB_IMG_1448919240821The world is filled with people waiting to put in their 2 pence worth. They have the ability to take the wind out of your sails and make it difficult to recover briefly for the moment you are in. the worst part can be when you are judged against who you are because of an event that has changed the course of life for someone. Should anyone really get the right to judge or manipulate the situation to benefit their own needs forgetting the cost?

cc03dbc6269f6de4f4a92b5a538c5b77For me I have been judged, labelled, cast to one side, manipulated and treated like I am the worst excuse for a human being over the years. Yet those that cast the stones forget who they are and how much of a shadow they have created upon society and reality. They have become absorbed by their own importance and they forget what is true and what is make believe. I took a break between blogging to get some perspective and see how I was getting on with returning to my own reality. I have rebuilt so much of my life in such a short space and have challenged not others but myself more and more with my commitment to fight. I am resilient to say the least. Those that have been affected with what happened on the 30th August have new places within my life, those who hurt and damaged my sanity and my clarity within reality are removed, and those that I was once close to are slowly getting back into my life but not in the same way instead it is never going to be as close as we were. For the simple reason I can’t be hurt, and nor should I. Everyone’s true colour will come out and those that have damaged the realms of reality will be seen for who they really are. Sadly, every decision we make will leave a mark on life and people will talk. I know my decisions will come back and the only difference is I don’t shy away from them, compared to others.

2015-11-12 11.25.49I admit I am a survivor of attempted suicide! I am proud to say a SURVIVOR, and while peoples true colour will be revealed I have to take the decision and step away, as I can’t be there to actively support people who have hurt me at the same time, because they believe what someone else can twist the world I exist in. Also for them they have to heal and find their resolve to what has happened and the difficult decision is always going be why they didn’t see it and next steps.

While I have had and been called every name under the sun and back I have to say sadly I am still here and most definitely not leave it anytime soon!

2015-11-07 23.23.48For me I have overcome a massive obstacle and that is walking into the manipulator, and I managed to keep my focus and carry on with my day and actually had one of the most successful days I have ever had since moving to Manchester. I have two more obstacles that I am still battling, part of me doesn’t want to tackle them as it could set me back. The other is to fully cut the manipulator fully out of my life and block out what he is and what he has that I have had to lose so I can find myself slightly.

Oprah-Winfrey-quoteAlso the other part of me has challenged my inexperience’s and exploring the world, even if its meetings people and spending time with people I haven’t experienced before. Enjoying those moments and not panicking as much.

The world spins on judgement calls and decisions which we have all taken part in to change society. Maybe it’s time we make the change to a less judgmental way of life. Freedom of speech is great but when it becomes a judgement we lose what it means and we lose a realm of respect.

I am….

Clear, honest and strong as I am not just ONE I am Alex, Stronger than ever. I am my own JUDGE!


One comment

  1. Sue · December 29, 2015

    JUDGE – Well done, to face the object of our discord and come out a stronger, powerful and better person shows how far you have travelled on your journey.

    Keep strong, your other objectives will be faced when you are ready. Do not rush them, things will fall into place and you will know when the time is right. It may even surprise you how easy you face the ‘dreaded’ subject.

    Onwards and upwards my love, feeling very proud


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