Poem of Convenience

The Convenience
by Unknown

Shhhh do you hear the noise? Sitting there in your big chair, can you hear the noise?

The noise of a tear drop from my cheek. The pin drop on the floor or each breath coming from your chest? Can you hear it? Can you feel it the emotion the run through every soul and person?

Listen to the weeping angels crying on the shoulders of those we have lost the tears that have been shed for those who no longer live here. Those that have passed on to a new home a new time and place.

Can you feel it the sensation on your skin as every hair tingles and your emotions are running sparking electricity through your body, the noise the sensation they running wild through?

Stand still and listen to the world pass by can you hear the tear drops can you hear my screams am I just the convenience that keeps coming back for more. The laughing the smiles are long gone the tears streaming down my face waiting for you to notice the voices no longer coming from my mouth but in my head taking over the day and life no longer the fun instead the screams waiting for the moment to ask Are you ok? The worlds colliding and taking over my being and soul I scream for it to stop and to leave but they continue to collide while you sit there unaware.

The keyboard warriors the socialites the ones that say I am there but cannot see what is happening or going on behind these hazel eyes.  The man of convenience sits and weeps while you party and dance. you don’t see the scars I have on my arms and body nor in my heart that has been destroyed day in and day out. You don’t see behind those rose-tinted spectacles. I will never be good enough for you to take them off so you can see the true me full of marks and scars. You will just carry on even if I disappear into the land. Hidden away from your eyes you will forget who I am or was and instead you will find a new convenience from the social world.

The land is waiting for a new body to take and feed off the bones of the last convenience for this earth. the soul has moved on beyond this realm and is in the newer plain awaiting my entry into beyond the pearly gates the hands of the lost awaiting to welcome the newest soul to their ranks. They no longer feel or have emotions they are beyond the living they are fearless and free. They don’t have the pain they once had in this realm we call NOW.

The defence of space, the word you say to protect yourself but not for anyone else to see if you got too close and touched the fire that has burnt your hand and your heart that you are scared to get close again. The voices and the murmurs ring around the corridors but you listen to their voices and words but not my own. You say you are a friend but you are like the rest, you never know what you have lost until they have left you alone, you begin your journey minus the convenience that was once there to hold your hand through thick and thin as convenience has the possibility of no longer being your convenience.

The soil is waiting for a future soul to welcome into its clasps you will never know what you once had until the convenience is no more.  your madness and my own will no longer be. This is time to leave you and the pain and suffering and listen for the tears.

Can you hear them fall….?

 

 

Full Circle

Well 2015 saw the beginning of the battle. Everywhere I looked there was leaves covering the path, making it impossible to find the route through the fog that slowly drifted in and was taking over my mind and my view. Looking around at what used to bring me joy and excitement was slowly crumbling within my own hands. Feeling each part of the puzzle become heavy and impossible to slot back together, the puzzle was no longer the same puzzle I had in 2014.

The beginning of the circle breaking up with my boyfriend at the end of 2014 ending a period which had been going on for too long and being let down slowly clouded judgement and decisions and accepting being made to feel inferior. My ex came along at a point in my life which is when I needed someone after losing my dad in 2012 on his birthday and grieving and trying to work my way through feeling insecure and unsure of who I am or wanted to be. I have been brought up to be kind, honest and to have manners. Some can see these qualities as weaknesses I see them as being who I am and want to be. It makes me strong and constantly reminds me of my upbringing. After splitting from him, ignoring my own mental health and seeing the fog from afar.

Through 2015 the battle continues and losing the qualities I possess that makes me tick and find the person I was losing. Seeing what half, the picture picking up on the situations and not dealing with them in the right way. Lashing out and making the situation worst or the person who was seeing it and wasn’t real. Some cases it would be the latter and some not so, I became the person who couldn’t be believed.  Posts on social media and comments and the now fully covered path of leaves and rocks no longer seeing where I was meant to be heading. Making the direction of travel impossible to remain on the rails, until the implosion of Pride ’15. The night my world and my soul, being and body could no longer cope or survive as that version of me. The fear and the darkness flooded every part of my body, I finally needed to stop and breath and find the light switch to find my way out of this spiral of destruction, the same spiral my father went through. Now trying to just remain standing and brush a few leaves away. From the moment 30th August 2015 was my lowest point atom find the strength to turn the key in the ignition of my car and drive away from Manchester for a night and trying to find some peace in my head, driving to my best friend’s home and we didn’t discuss what had happened or what was going on, I was left to just take a breath and find aa footing. The hardest part of the illness was making the call home to my mum telling her how low I had become and feeling a failure for being weak. Fear and darkness were part of me from that point on, for several weeks I had to stop and break the routine rarely home in Manchester but at friends and family’s homes keeping myself to myself and writing these blogs through my battles of the highest and lowest moments of depression.

Getting back to what a routine is meant to be, and returning to work, continuing with medication, the path slowly becoming clearer with leaves still across the path in places but slowly the wind blows them away. Friends becoming more available the more I was open about having an illness, no longer feeling isolated or alone. I felt a part of something that wasn’t just me in this fight but I had support. Throughout fighting the illness, I remember that I had to learn from this fight.  New Year’s Eve in 2015 was my first night out in Manchester since pride and my first time being out with others, my friends who are my support network.  Facing so much in 2015 was difficult and some part hurt and still do, it did teach me a lot.

2016 was the beginning of a new chapter and new milestones. Turning 30 and settling into a new life of being me. Being able to say no and distance myself from anything that didn’t make me smile.

Walking into fear and the possibility of bumping into fear at any point was terrifying at times, but then freeing myself of the fear. I began a relationship which wasn’t on the cards at all. The relationship had its moments of happiness and great darkness. As most relationships, they have ups and downs and they all have different directions, sadly the relationship didn’t work and there has been a lot of words and comments have been said and aits now time to put the whole situation to bed.

From these moments, it has developed my resiliency and drive and make me stand back on my own 2 feet, with friends who are now family. Each battle has to let the dust settle and the moments after the fight is when you can see the clear picture of what has happened. Overtime the dust completely clears and you can new parts of this ever-changing puzzle that you never noticed before a piece of part of the puzzle.

When you begin to fight through and deal with depression you slowly deal with recovery, and find challenges great and small. Throughout my 18 month when I started this recovery, I set myself some challenges to achieve was to be able to sit in a public space alone with strangers around me and being able to drink a coffee and to feel comfortable in my own skin. Something I have constantly felt uneasy about. Finally achieving I can sit in a room alone as I am never alone, I am supported by great people, I have an amazing family and some uniquely brilliant friends. In 2016 I, had as many lows and highs and the one of the greatest high’s I will always hold I no longer surviving I am a survivor! From that I challenge the walls and the fears a no longer run away unsure instead I stand my ground.

From this I’ve decided this will be the final blog for #IamONE as I am no longer the one alone, I have gone full circle being able to go out with people I would never dreamed of spending time with at New Years!  I survived Pride 16 when the world was looking like it would implode again it didn’t! being able to go back to Scotland and being at the event that brought me into the gay world, and become part of the community. The lows don’t need to be gone back over again, those who have been part of the lows my only wish is for you to find happiness and be at peace of the past and live in the now. I am free from those lows the sadness and the darkness, I hope you find that inner peace one day. Bearscots I started to say a mantra,

I am Kind

I am Strong

I deserve better

I am…ME

Thank you for reading this blog and being part of my journey I am no longer the person I was in 2015 or 2014! I am the newer me, not fully recovered and never will be cured but I will continue this fight with your helping hand.

My favourite quote I have, “Stumbling isn’t falling” I will never fall with all your kindness and support.

Thank you

I am finally FREE to be me.

Alex

Man behind the Mask!

I stand and I cry I feel I hurt. The words you hear from anyone who is suffering from a difficult situation. The time that you are going through and you are on the level that feels normal no longer in the deepest darkest parts of depression. You are in the grey the void, moving along calmly and confidently and ploughing through the issues and the problems that are being thrown are you.

Then it hits as if you have been plunged into an ice bath the cold icy water soaking into your clothes hairs on your arms and legs going into shock the body begins to shiver, the body shutting down and going into spasm and slowly the ice water consumes every part of your being, slowly becoming isolated and alone. No longer feeling the person you were when you were on the path has collapsed and the road is become slipped away into the ice.

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That path has taken a sudden turn and the rain is coming down harder than before. It is going through every piece of your clothes and draining the colour out of you. The once pink skin now tinged with grey, sorrow and becoming sore. The eyes hiding the reality of what is going on behind the mask that has been put up to the world. The mask is so good it can fool everyone and anyone including yourself pretending it is ok and the wounds you once had won’t reopen again as it is taking over the body and soul like a wave of dread. Nothing is hitting the mask of what is happening off of your face. Every step feels like walking in quick sand. Sucking in the soul turning your heart to stone. No longer being allowed to feel the softness the kindness is lost being absorbed into the ether. The heart turning and breaking into piece with every beat. The mask doesn’t apply to just the outside of the body, but the whole person.

“We understand how dangerous a mask can be. We all become what we pretend to be.” 
― 
Patrick Rothfuss

If you look at me do you see me as half a man or half a person because I have a mental health condition? Can you see the illness beyond the mask I wear hiding the scars and the wounds that no one can see until the mask is moved.  I stand behind this mask same as everyone who hides how they are actually feeling the emotions that wish it could escape and fit in like everyone else. Removing the mask only briefly so no one can see the reality of when I struggle or the real me, who has put up a wall of defence to protect myself and others from seeing the mark of the last attack.

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Recently I have had my first big lapse after everything I have gone through the past year. It finally happened as its normal to have bad low points in life. This time it was as if the world was crumbing in on me. As parts of my world was under attack within my working life to suddenly no longer feeling good enough to be with people or near. A reminder of the previous wars I have had against people when this whole fight begun, with my old mask finally removed and my then identity exposed to the world as a victim of depression. No longer feeling I could be part of society as a whole and I needed to hide away and not be seen by the world. a new mask now being worn that has been locked away never expecting for it to be seen or worn. The mask with many cracks and many scars attached, it shows the lapse and the wounds  I have tried to forget form growing up being bullied, being emotionally abused, being alone a lot as people didn’t realise what they were doing. The traumatic events that have shaped and guided my life and created and the person I am. Even with the doors on those events firmly closed they are still showing on the mask.

Can I stop the illness, no the illness is now part of my life and is going to be a factor in those good and bad days that I know the so called “normal” world have. My days just seem to be more perpetual and more destructive on the occasion of the low points.

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Revisions

With this blog I wrote this when I was at a low point remembering my past the destruction and how my mask slipped and I was no longer holding myself together instead I was letting external factors to influence what was going on with who I was. The effects of some people can have on a persons persona where being called selfish, ugly, horrible person can hurt but when I look at who is throwing the insults and the digs at me. Has proven a something, they could be right but its most likely they are wrong, my intention and my path is very clear and I stand by my morals. I believe in being kind and supportive to the world and those that show the same back deserve my time, those who are just keep taking, and never being there in return do not have the upper hand. I was brought up to be respectful, some could say soft some would say weak. I say I am me! The people who want me in their lives accept me for being this clumsy, silly, tall who wears my heart on the sleeve. I accept my mask can fall and it will occasionally show more than I really want to show the world, but then again who mask doesn’t slip especially when you don’t want it to. Unless you have something to be ashamed of, and I am no longer ashamed of having an depression or anxiety.

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I will not be judged as only having an illness I am just me, who has an illness but has many layers and many masks that shows who I am. Having the sad moments and the high points in life, its normality and when external factors come into fruition well I must have done something right as they have nothing better than to attack me. Go for it, as reality is I can dust myself off and get back on the horse again and still be true to me. Can you?

I am ONE

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Dare To BEAR

When you have a fear, it can become too much to face on your own. As a survivor and current sufferer of chronic depression. “I rise” with help of my friends and loved one I continue to fight through the darkness and the fears. Daring to grow and become strong facing the fears that cloud path forward unsure of where to turn. The light of my friends care and love shining through like a beacon of hope they have helped to protect and support. As a sufferer it is hard to let people in and see when someone really cares and the light coming in from the outside, as the path and the world outside is dark and bleak.

With dealing with depression and anxiety issues it is sometimes difficult to get back on with what we call “normal” life and going out and being who you want to be as each moment of the day as a sufferer you are fighting to get through the seconds, minutes, the hours and the day it can become too much to carry on and trying to just survive becomes the primary goal of the day.

Image result for Bearscots logoThe reason why I decided this blog would be different is because I have had to comes to terms with no longer being a victim but a survivor. There is some part of me that are still very raw and the strength to get through events don’t always come from me, but the strength comes from my friends and family. I have recently been to an event that I haven’t been to in 2 years and the last time I went to it I was in a relationship with my ex. Bearscots was when I first really got my first proper taste of the gay world as I grew up in London being the only gay guy out of my group of friends, it was a learning curve. With the events of 2012 where I lost my father and the family war of his side and confidence to try and make the first real steps into the world that I am apart of even if I didn’t know if I was really ready was overwhelming. The first night I was terrified my confidence was quite low as I was still very new to the world and at the event on my own in the big part as I was still getting to know people. Then I met the ex. They say that’s the end of that and it was, I had 2 years with him and came out with quite a few scars which hurt and they still do to a point but they have happened and I have come to terms with the majority of the problems we were had. I will always fight through the feeling of being the forgotten person and being the least important as I have had years of events being let down. With this year’s Bearscots it was meant to be different it been 2 years I have grown I have started to tackle the problems always head on in my own time and this year Bearscots was one I was tackling with friends and family who were there to hold my hand and pull me through the events of the weekend.

I had to dare myself to push myself through and try to enjoy myself facing the fear walking into an ex, pushing out the memories of the previous events in Edinburgh but also pushing through and baring my soul that I can be safe and enjoy myself in a place that holds so many memories and be safe away from my home and in a place on my own at times.  Many friend’s hands pulling and supporting me through shining bright to get me through the dark times and the path and brushing away the obstacles that appear on the path.

This year’s Bearscots was the event that I have always put above all other events. This is because it feels a lot like home, where it all begun and I could feel comfortable not only being me, but comfortable with other people around me. This year I had a lot of adrenaline building up and was feeling anxious a lot of the time. I was drinking as well at this event as I haven’t really been drinking alcohol a lot of the time when I go out, just to let me to remain in control but this time I decided to go against that rule and just enjoy myself as much as I could as, I can’t control everything and I shouldn’t need too. This year I did have a panic attack outside one of the venues and was on my own for a bit as I couldn’t push through the fear. It felt like time had stopped and I was frozen in time. Friends saw me outside and came and started to try calm me down and help me through the panic.  Looking back at the events of the weekend I doubt and know I wouldn’t have been able to get through the weekend. I actually laughed a lot more then I feared, I danced and drunk as it no one was watching me. Not feeling self-conscious about my weight or my body I enjoyed myself. The pictures show me as I am, smiling being comfortable and being able to say I am me.

A mantra I had to write on the mirror and repeat when I was walking to my friends;

“I am Strong
 I am Better
 I am Kind
 I DESERVE BETTER”

I dare to BEAR and pull through the illness that takes so many people, the statistics are still 1 in 4 adults still face mental health illness. I bare my illness and don’t hide it away but nor do I make it my world or my life, it can feel like it is all I talk about or I am now but I am far from the illness. People come up to me now and talk about how I don’t hide away or how I take the fight to the illness. The reason I bare my soul and the fight is I can see the world differently to what I use to see it as being very differently and being broken view. I am not ashamed of the illness and some days I do wish I wasn’t fighting it and didn’t have the illness but it won’t change anything. I am honest about the battle same as who I have always been, HONEST.

Its ok to have a lapse it is only for a moment not the whole beginning. I have had a few lapses and they are difficult at the time but I learn from each lapse. What is the triggers? What is going on in the bigger world? Am I forgetting what I have learnt in the past to deal with them? The majority of the answers would be yes I have forgotten that I am forgetting the bigger picture and the other coping strategies I have learnt. I didn’t even think about doing my mindfulness this week and it was a sign that I still have really long road to battle through, it is very much a learning curve and I have to think more about me at times especially when I am feeling the world is getting a bit too heavy.

Never feel the battle is too big or feel you have to face it alone. Friends and family and those you might not expect will support you through thick and thin. My best friend who is basically my brother we started this way and now I can’t think of life without having him about. Same as most of my friends they have moved from being just friends but part of my wider family. I will see everyone next year at Bearscots as I owe it to myself to enjoy myself.

To my friends, Family & Supporters Thank you for being there for me and lighting up the path. x

I am ONE

FYI!

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This is my blog and holds my opinions, if people do not like this blog or my opinion please do not threaten me. Just stop reading! its that simple! It is ok to have a differing opinion but does not give anyone the right to threaten me. Any threats will be passed onto the relevant authorities. 

After my break from writing my next blog is called Butterfly. This will be out soon! 

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Phoenix

Ash to ash dust to dust. The illness that once ruled some people lives with our mental health being more and more prominent within society and the local wellbeing networks that we create over the years. Not all the networks will be for the better.

We go through these stages of losing who we are like an onion which I have wrote about in a previous blog, the many layers of the onion are like our lives. We lose who we are each time we shed that shell of the onion. As that person and shell will never return or re grow you will have parts of that former person appearing with the characteristics but they have been burned away and the rebirth the rise of the “PHOENIX”

The mystical myth the phoenix the fire bird that never dies just comes back stronger and stronger each time. The fire of the rebirth isn’t fast it is a slow transformation into the fire being. Slowly the ashes scatter with us while we walk our lives and never knowing that your old self is no longer there instead you are the new you!

…ONE Year ago “I am ONE” was born the birth of my own phoenix, the beginning to my own recovery from last year where the darkness took over me and I went to the lowest point of my life. The darkness that takes more people every year. It doesn’t believe in excluding anyone for gender, creed, orientation it is all inclusive disease that is soul destroying and it attacks from the inside out.

Back on the 3rd September 2015 my first two blogs were created “I Am One & ONE” five days after the darkness took over on the 30th August 2015 at Manchester Pride it felt like the world was better without me being around and didn’t need me. No matter how much I did to try and fix me it never seemingly worked or would stick so I struggled for 10 years. From the voices in my head telling me “I wasn’t good enough”, “you’re not wanted here” “Die” the voices were getting louder and louder and becoming more controlling. Emotions got heightened and losing more of who I was back then as that person who was constantly fighting and trying to lead a normal life which was impossible to live back then, as I never accepted how ill I was.

Over the year, I have scattered the old ashes and slowly as a walk this earth the old parts of me that were broken. Giving me an opportunity to recover and find the parts of me to free the parts that were prisoned in the high walls of the prison. The fire of my depression and anxiety and stress, took part of me and was a big piece to overcome. It has taken a lot of effort and slowly with help from friends and my family I have grown and the inner phoenix has got bigger and become stronger.  Even entering into a relationship has helped to build up my resistance and I still have to work on that and being able to fight off the feelings of being less than someone else.

A year on and I have taken my bashes and the old scars have opened on occasion but they have been very much helped to make me who I am today.

“If you wanna go somewhere, and you wanna be somebody, you better wake up and pay attention.”

Phoenix will never die, and neither will I. This year has taught me anything nothing is impossible.  I have written the take 5 project which sadly wasn’t picked up beyond the first draft due to the it being too similar to the main wellbeing agenda that is on-going.  I have also completed all my treatment process with CBT, Mindfulness & Counselling and continued with my medication.

Thank you everyone who has been part of my recovery and helped me to transform into me.

xx

 

 

 

 

Control

So the silence is finally over with my blog. I have been busy with work and spending quality time with the new man in my life.

Work has been an interesting time as of late, mainly because one big project piece I worked on from new services has been given the green light and is going to be used as a national document! Compared to my old job where anything I did that was designed to help the business was turned down. So a  new feeling having something signed off. As I don’t rest on my lorrels I have also started to work on a new project. A project focusing on bringing awareness to Mental Wellbeing within an office environment. I am going to be bringing together the take 5 from time to change and workshops specific to Mental Health and Stress. So 2016 is turning into a big year with everything and one year on.

Even to the point I have walked into the devils playground and bumped into the catalysts of my destruction last year. I have survived with help from my friends and yet the fear of seeing the catalyst is still strong but I have faced the fear. Reality is always odd but how can I fear someone who in a way has helped break this illness it didn’t feel it at the time but I have been freed from an illness that has controlled my life for 10 years.While they now go through their own battles I can live my life! I should point out I don’t forgive nor do I forget!

While I know people are out there who hate me for being me, I couldn’t care as I have better and more important things to be doing.

Now I control my destiny and I can say it is looking amazing!

 

Pride

For years we have seen within the UK equality and more of a shift in culture of acceptance compared to back in the 60’s. It was illegal for people to be who they wanted to be.  During the period of the decriminalising there was the “stonewall riots” within America which was still a criminal offence in the USA. A high number of spontaneous raids took place across the USA, creating shockwaves across the LGBT community and begun the Stonewall Riots which turned into a violent clash against the police force.

Every year different parts of the world remember the movement how the change to our culture has given us all. Within the United Kingdom we are fortunate we can be who we want to be and follow our hearts. It is still illegal within 73 countries around the world to be gay. There are only 19 countries within the world mainly within America & Europe it is legally accepted and recognised as a Marriage. There is still major progress to change society across the world and also closer to home. Relationships within the LGBT community can be very fragmented and stigmatised from the outset if you don’t fit the mould the community doesn’t help itself as it is in places attacking each other from within and not accepting the different shades of the sub cultures. We all have our moments where we don’t accept the different people within the community.

Some of the statistics from the LGBT Foundation

  • GB people are twice as likely as heterosexual people to have suicidal thoughts or to make suicide attempts
  • LGB people are two to three times more likely than heterosexual people to suffer from depression
  • Over half of gay young people deliberately harm themselves yet the NSPCC estimates that for young people in general its between 1 in 15 and 1 in 10.
  • 1 in 5 BME lesbian and bisexual (LB) bisexual women have an eating disorder compared to 1 in 20 of the general populatio1 in 4 gay and bisexual (GB) men report being in fair or bad health compared to 1 in 6 men in general
  • A third of GB men who have accessed healthcare services in the last year have had a negative experience related to their sexual orientation
  • A quarter of GB men currently smoke compared to 22% of men in general
  • Across all age groups LGB people could be seven times more likely to take drugs
  • One in 12 LB women have been diagnosed with breast cancer compared to one in 20 of all women

We as a whole sometimes lose the bigger picture how we are moulding society and the culture and how we can change the negative aspect and views of culture change and make them local community better.

Over recent weeks and year, I have got more involved with the events surrounding pride, and the sub cultural days like Manchester based event Bearbash and Scotland’s leading bear event “Bearscots” to more localised events especially recently the Birmingham stands movement, and the Manchester Stand Movements to Pride events. Attending and participating in Bristol pride & later this year the biggest pride events of Manchester Pride.

Bristol pride for me was my first time down there and at an event since last September’s events I participated and did the march with my best friends, and his partner and friends who welcomed in a stranger from the outside, allowing me to walk with them and make me feel a part of their special day. I stood with my friends and got to know and meet a vast variety of people from different walks of life, but they weren’t all from the LGBT community. Pride has become more inclusive to all communities welcoming anyone and everyone, with the understanding you are welcome as long as you accept us as an equal.

This is the same as taking part in Birmingham, sometimes we look around and can’t see anyone and we feel very isolated by the busy bustle that life brings but when you just stop and you look around and truly look you notice you’re not alone. You can go to an event like Birmingham and be with people you know but there are people you don’t know but they are standing with you for the same reason you are standing. At Birmingham Stands Movement we were standing together for Orlando. It wasn’t an attack on America it was an attack on being different and being a part of the LGBT community 49 people lost these lives due to the one act of one man we will never know the true reason as to why he did what he did this devastating act.

The Rainbow stands for different elements  that represent of the community,

Hot Pink- Sexuality
Red- Life
Orange- Healing
Yellow- Sunlight
Green- Nature
Turqoise- Magic/ Art
Blue- Seentiy/ Harmony
Violet- Spirit

I remember my very first pride was Manchester pride I was with friends still living in London and it has to be one of my best pride events I have been to. This was around the time of the Russia was releasing propaganda about being a part of the LGBT community. The acceptance out there was and is not the same as within the West. Baiting to find who is gay and beating and abusing them into shame. Shutting down gay clubs and events and even Pride marches as it is deemed to be brain washing and distribution to minors. Which it is, it is just about accepting themselves for who they want to be.

If you look at the clip below in Turkey Pride event,

Water cannons at a pride event are hardly friendly nor are they gentle this is bullying and assault one person standing in the street waving a rainbow flag is struck with jets of water aiming at the flag and then his head, throwing him hard to the ground, most likely causing injuries to him. You don’t see there is no activists in the event or riots or malicious acts were carried out. The police force just attacked those that are different to them.

For me Pride has made me feel more included and involved within the community and reminds me because of those who have had to fight for me and themselves to have a chance to be equal as peers around the world who so happen to follow the dream of being married to a member of the opposite sex and having acceptance across the world. They have laid the foundation and gave me the opportunity to be me.

Thank you to everyone who has paved the path from the past, the present and the future.

We are ONE, We are the RAINBOW

p.s. See you at future Pride events & Bearscots as I wont hide away from from these events due to fear.

A x